Crumbs

This entire post might be a complete over share, but here goes anyway.

I am tired of cleavage crumbs. 

You heard me right - I am constantly finding crumbs in my cleavage...and I'm officially sick of it!

Let me elaborate.  I don't wear low cut tops - in fact, I prefer to cover up "the girls", and I don't consider myself a terribly messy eater (aside from the random dribble).  But, somehow, no matter what I do, I always end up with crumbs in my cleavage.  As if having a large chest isn't bad enough...now I have to worry about attracting ants down my shirt!

Most often I'm aware that some of my food has defected from my mouth in search of solace within the confines of my boobs, though more than a few times I have found a lovely little surprise waiting for me when I change clothes.  "Ooh...goodie...an M&M!"
It's terrible (not to mention uncomfortable)!

At some point over the last year or so, my boobs began attracting little bits of whatever I happen to be eating.  Crackers, cookies, sandwiches, macaroni, cereal, rice, salad - you name it, I've had to dig it out of my bra.  I try to be discrete about evacuating the debris from my chest, but honestly, how likely is it that I could be wrist deep down my shirt without someone noticing? 

Some people are destined to spill - no matter what they eat, it ends up across the front of them.  But not me - no, instead I seem destined to carry bits of my meals around with me in my own little hands-free "to go" box.

Do I need to stop eating things that come apart when you bite into them?  Do I need to run everything through a blender and sip it through a straw?  Do I need to invest in turtlenecks from now on?

I simply don't know what to do about the cleavage crumbs!