Valentine's Day

 Valentine's Day is a challenge.  People either throw themselves into it - flowers, candy, cards, gifts, romantic dinners...or they don't.  Very rarely is there an in-between. 

Today, instead of getting myself caught up in the chaos that surrounds Valentine's Day, I'm not thinking about me.  I'm not thinking about whether I got flowers, or gifts, or a romantic dinner out.

Today, I'm thinking about my parents.

My dad has never been good at big holidays.  Even long before the Alzheimer's, he didn't "get it".  I'd call to remind him of mom's birthday, or their anniversary, and often helped him with Christmas shopping. 

This year, he approached me about doing something for my mom - I kind of blew him off, because he asked me on February 1st. 

One of JB's new favorite things to do is to go to the grocery store with my mom.  But, instead of walking the store with her, he prefers to sit in the cafe area, drink a cup of coffee, and people watch.  

Last Friday, I got a call from my dad while he was sitting in the grocery store cafe having a cup of coffee.

After our usual small talk, he asked if I'd help him with Valentine's Day.  He told me that he wanted to get a card and a dozen yellow roses (her favorite) for mom. 

Now, one might be inclined to think "Gee, he's at the store right now.  Why doesn't he just walk over to the floral department, buy a card and flowers, and be done?". 

Well, Alzheimer's doesn't work that way. 

So, I told him that we'd take care of it that weekend - little did I know that there would be a pretty substantial snow storm and that we'd be snowed in.

Long story short, the weekend got away from me. 

Last night, on my way home (at 9:00 at night), I realized that I still hadn't gotten anything for my dad to give to my mom.  So, dutiful daughter that I am, I stopped at the store, bought a card and flowers, and drove straight to my parents' house. 

Any frustration I'd had with my dad not thinking to get a card on his own, or irritation at the fact that I hadn't been home since 8:30 that morning, quickly disappeared when I saw how proud my dad was to be able to present my mom with a card and her favorite flowers.

Granted, he didn't do it on his own, but he DID remember that it was Valentine's Day, and he DID think that it would be nice to get something for my mom. 

I know Valentine's Day isn't about getting flowers, or cards, or going out to dinner - it's about remembering.  Remembering to set aside time to tell your special someone that they're special.  Remembering that sometimes we forget to put them up on the pedestal that they belong on.  Remembering to say "thank you for loving me".

This year...Dad remembered!

Happy Valentine's Day!